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Microsoft Humor In Knowledge Base Articles

Computer Randomly Plays Classical Music

http://support.microsoft.com/?kbid=261186

SUMMARY

During normal operation or in Safe mode, your computer may play "Fur Elise" or "It's a Small, Small World" seemingly at random. This is an indication sent to the PC speaker from the computer's BIOS that the CPU fan is failing or has failed, or that the power supply voltages have drifted out of tolerance. This is a design feature of a detection circuit and system BIOSes developed by Award/Unicore from 1997 on.

MORE INFORMATION

Although these symptoms may appear to be virus-like, they are the result of an electronic hardware monitoring component of the motherboard and BIOS. You may want to have your computer checked or serviced.

Your Password Must Be at Least 18770 Characters and Cannot Repeat Any of Your Previous 30689 Passwords

http://support.microsoft.com/?kbid=276304

SYMPTOMS

If you log on to an MIT realm, press CTRL+ALT+DELETE, click Change Password, type your existing MIT password, and then type a new, simple password that does not pass the dictionary check in Kadmind, you may receive the following error message:

Your password must be at least 18770 characters and cannot repeat any of your previous 30689 passwords. Please type a different password. Type a password that meets these requirements in both text boxes.

Note that the number of required characters changes from 17,145 to 18,770 with the installation of SP1.

NOTE: This is not a common case; it occurs only when you configure Windows 2000 to authenticate against an MIT Kerberos domain.

How to Work with More Than 64,000 Children Per Parent

http://support.microsoft.com/?kbid=303969

SUMMARY

SQL Server 2000 Books Online specifies that the maximum number of child members a parent can have is 64,000. What does this mean? What can you do if you have a dimension that violates this rule? What if a parent has more than 64,000 children?