August 2006 - Posts
Why is it that I grew up in a Roman Catholic home and received 12 years of formal (Roman Catholic) education only to, years later (around the age of 19), leave the Catholic Church (running) in disbelief and questioning the very Dogmatic principles of Catholicism?
Why is it, years later (around the age of 21), that I found myself, while studying and researching various religions of the world, converting to Judaism? Coincidentally I would marry a Jewish woman and folks thought I converted for her when the fact is – I actually converted long before I ever asked her to marry me (and I was living) 6,000 mile away at the time of my conversion. I converted because I felt I had finally found a (proverbial) home in Judaism.
Interestingly what I really found in Judaism was in fact a home – but not so much a spiritual one as much as a cultural and familial one. Understand – there neither is nor was NOTHING wrong with my nuclear family or culture – I love them both whole-heartedly. The familial and cultural home I found in Judaism just happened to be a “second home” of sorts.
Am I a person devoid of faith due to lack of willingness to believe? I do not think so. Why would I have searched for so many years for a religion that fit me and my internal belief structure (rather than the other way around)? For me (I speak for no one else) searching for a religion that fit me and my internal belief system was a far better way to find a spiritual home than going to school and being forced to take a theological class every day (for 12 years) – better than sitting in a mosque listening to an Imam tell me how I should live my life according to Allah’s will or in some Baptist church having some Minister tell me the was of Jesus Christ Our Lord and Savior.
Am I a person incapable of making that leap of faith? At this point in my life, my answer must be yes. My reasons aa varied and true to me as the reasons for faith are to those with piety and belief.
I have seen a lot in this world. Much of it good. Unfortunately, a great deal of it has been bad.
I have cut a young man down from a stretched rope while he (until the moment that rope went taut) lived 250 miles away from his family and died (by his own hand) alone. I have seen people in Thailand living in such squalor I felt I was walking through a Sally Struthers commercial emptying my pockets for them (don’t think me some great philanthropist – it was only 3,000 Baht). I have seen people step of elderly people living in the street (I cannot be a hypocrite here – I am one of those people). Certainly these are a fraction of the cumulative sadness and horror I have seen – as well as everyone reading this (since my experiences of sadness are not unique).
In the news everyday, we hear about some child that was murdered by their parent(s) or molested or just outright abandoned in the trash. Wars are waged (and have been for centuries) in the name of “god” – my god is better than yours is – you are going to burn in hell for your beliefs etc.
Knowing that these things occur everyday makes it impossible for me to accept that there is some all knowing all loving father figure out there allowing this to go on day in and day out. Were this father figure to be so compassionate – so loving and all knowing these things would not go on. The argument of “god works in mysterious ways” is a dog that will not hunt for me. Further, the “all according to his plan” discussions hold just as little water for me (said none).
This post is not a BASH on those with a belief structure. I am actually happy for those people – I am happy that they are fortunate enough to make that leap of faith and believe. Truly I am.
I suppose this, more than any other post I have made to date, is just me venting and release some of the anger and sadness I have inside right now. That is not a search for attention – just an admission of the truth.
Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of audio/video work (slideshows, home movies, Photoshop/sound embedded emails etc) and I’ve come across a freebie that I haven’t used in a while but now realize why I first started using it.
Audacity is a stable, reliable and free audio mixing platform that provides a multitude of features (I will list some below). There are some small bugs here and there (what exactly do you want from a free open source application) but it has a nice temporary file recovery process when you bring the application back up.
Some features of Audacity (full feature list can be found here):
* Unlimited Undo functions (and Redo actually)
* Unlimited track mixing
* Export to WAV, MP3
* 16 channel recording
* Able to record from Inputs or microphones
* Record in 16, 24 or 32 bit
* Variety of effects and plug-ins
Check out Audacity HERE
A short drop today.
Below is a link to one of the better (visual) sites I have come across for checking your connection speeds on the web.
Check it out.
I once had a friend that worked the graveyard shift (11 PM to 7 AM) at a 7-11. At the same time I was working the 3rd (5PM to 1 AM) shift in one of Amtrak’s offices.
When I got off work – most everyone else was already fast asleep, 99.9% of businesses were closed and most bars were closing (other than VFWs and American Legion Posts) so, other than going back to my apartment and watching infomercials, there wasn’t much for me to do. So, I used to go hang out with him for a few hours.
There were a few of us that worked late shifts that hung out there. Actually, once in a while there were enough of us there at one time that sometimes we’d be able to get a game of wiffleball going in the parking lot (in the middle of the night). But we’d turn a normal wiffleball game into as close to a hard-ball game as possible. We’d take one of the thin wiffleball bats (there for sale) over to the meat counter – slice off the top – load the bat with D-Cell batteries and tape the top back on with electrical tape. Then, we’d load up a wiffleball with tinfoil and wrap the ball with masking tape. We’d have a good ½ hour to 45 minutes to play before the ball became a total mess.
In addition - to say that some interesting people would come in to a 7-11 at that time of night is a gross understatement.
For instance:
There was a washed up old school boxer (never turned Pro) named Robert (I won’t use his last name although he’s most certainly dead by now) Robert was not only a complete ragging alcoholic but he was also semi homeless (yes semi-homeless – every once in a while he’d tell us he got kicked out of the latest halfway house he was staying in for fighting) and would offer to bare-knuckle fight ANYONE that came in to the store for a few dollars. He was LOUD and OBNOXIOUS and he always smelled of really cheap whiskey and, well there’s really no other way to say it, urine.
There was Slobber Bob – a not quite all there guy with a speech impediment and a serious drooling habit. He was completely harmless but maybe the most annoyingly chatty person you’d ever have the misfortune of running in to. Bob had floated around the Roslyn, Ardsley, and North Hills, PA. area for years and the easiest way to get rid of him (day or night) was to tell him that someone had Christmas lights they needed taken down. If you told him that and that they were willing to give him 5 bucks for it, off he’d go. Sure it was a bit cruel but also amusing to send him to someone’s house at 1:30 in the morning asking if they still needed their Christmas light taken down.
There was a gentlemen that drove a delivery truck for the Montgomery County Record (one of the local newspapers) he did actually have a name but we simply called him Stinky. Why Stinky you ask? Well Stinky was unfortunate enough to have to tote around a colostomy bag (you asked WHY) and when he would come in (around 1:30 or 2:00 AM), before he would unload the early editions, he’d go back into the bathroom and empty his errrr luggage and it would STINK to the high heavens for at least another 30 minutes. Sure, he had no control over that odor but we were young and when you’re young making fun of people is not only FUN but is also considered a sport in some parts of the world.
There was Flakes an aged Hippie that used to wear a rolled up bandana (American flag pattern) with tails (like the scarves on Steven Tyler’s microphone) in the back all the way to the ground. Flakes was flakey (hence the name) and harmless but amusing in small doses. He called EVERY woman that entered the store, while he was there, “my lady” and each night when he left he would shout “Don’t eat the brown acid”
These were only a select few of the whackos that would frequent the North Hills, PA. 7-11 in the wee hours of the morning.
What does this have to do with a review of CLERKS 2???? Well, this time in my life made me one of the (very) many HUGE fans of the original movie CLERKS. Not only was that movie a riot – but there was a LOT of stuff I could relate to (the crazies coming into the store, the would-be philosophers, the near-do-wells, the burnouts, the drunks and all the glory that came with them).
Because CLERKS was such a great movie and SO original I was hesitant to see the sequel. I must say that I was pleasantly surprised. I did in fact enjoy CLERKS 2. If you go at this movie keeping a few things in mind I think you will enjoy it too.
- Accept the fact that there was absolutely NO reason to make a sequel and then – let it go
- Realize early on that the thing that just seems “wrong” while you’re watching CELRKS 2 is the fact that it wasn’t shot on 8mm black and white film rather it’s done in color and with Panavision cameras and the cinematography is clear and not at all grainy (Shooting in 8mm black and white was just one <of many> stroke(s) of genius by Kevin Smith in the original giving the effect of the movie showing the lives of the “clerks” from the security cameras in the Quik Stop and the video store.)
- Kevin Smith is NOT trying to make Clerks 2 out to be a “punched up” version of the original.
There is not only quintessential Randall philosophy imparted on the audience, but some other intelligent dialogue, quality slapstick and verbal comedy.
Out of a possible 5 stars – I’d give CLERKS 2 a rating of 2 ¾ to 3 stars.
Check it out – I don’t think you’ll be disappointed.
To all the Microsoft and Bill Gates – tell me again how he’s such a bad person and how he’s evil for living the American Dream ( you know – being successful and all that evil stuff)
The battle against three diseases that are a scourge of sub-Saharan Africa and other developing regions – HIV/AIDS, tuberculosis and malaria – was given an enormous boost Wednesday with a half-billion dollar gift from the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation.
The wealthy couple, leaders in the field of global public health, donated $500-million over five years to the Global Fund to Fight AIDS, Tuberculosis and Malaria.
FULL STORY HERE
As far as I am concerned - two weeks at the beach with your family will do wonders for your stress levels, health, attitude and overall demeanor.
